8 Oct

2009 Handcar Regatta Race Results

As proclaimed by Erasmus P. Kitty in Races.

TrophyWe are proud to present The Great Handcar Regatta 2009 race results!

Three cheers for the dedicated teams who battled valiantly against all odds and callouses to complete AND race their fabulous contraptions of kinetic madness!

Race Block 1 — 12:30 pm
# Contraption (Team) Heat 1 Heat 2
001 MOG (Childrens Museum Sonoma County) 0:24.86 0:28.40
282 IronClad Surfer (Ironclad Surfers) DQ DQ
403 Flying Quagmire (Walnut Ct Apprentices) 1:40.31 0:34.19
564 Wonkatania (Uff Da-Loompas) 1:52.97 0:55.27
775 Screaming Vortex (Escape Velocity) 0:42.03 0:50.33
906 Rock*N*Roll Sunday School Fixed Gear
(Strong Men of SR) 		0:43.14 1:46.93

Race Block 2 — 1:30 pm
# Contraption (Team) Heat 1 Heat 2
447 Toad in the Stew (Brothers of Benedict) 0:26.62 0:28.06
288 Cyclotron (South Pacific Coaster) 0:21.03 0:23.17
109 Methodical Juggernaut (Infernal Manufacturing) 0:40.65 0:47.22
810 Murray the Fish (David Farish, Krank-Boom-Clank) 0:43.64 0:35.66
911 Two Penny (Todd Barricklow) 1:30.24 1:57.0
012 Sheffields Fantastic Trolley (Chain Gang) 0:37.10 0:25.36

Break Race

SHOWDOWN!
Whaaaan-dom Tantrum Pampermonium (Krank-Boom-Clank & Fou Fou Ha!) VS Random Tandem Pandemonium (Whiskeydrunk Cycles)

Thenagain Bomber (Whiskeydrunk Cycles) VS Randem Tandem Pandemonium (Whiskeydrunk Cycles as raced by arch-rivals Krank-Boom-Clank)

Race Block 3 — 2:30 pm
# Contraption (Team) Heat 1 Heat 2
613 La Carreta Diabolica (Los Guapos Diablos) DQ 0:29.21
414 Rail Skins (Nordic Track) DQ 2:02.95
915 Hennepin Crawler (Krank-Boom-Clank) 1:05.57 0:28.97
016 Thenagain Bomber (Whiskeydrunk Cycles) 0:34.10 1:11.82
117 Rebel Rollers (Chop’s Teen Center) 0:42.64 1:11.83
518 Bumping Contraption (Psychedelic Engineers) 0:27.13 0:28.0

Race Block 4 — 4:30 pm
# Contraption (Team) Heat 1 Heat 2
The Westerner (Bret Gave – Trek Store Santa Rosa) 0:27.83 DQ
420 The Radmobile (SRJC) 2:18.49 DQ
Velocipede (Rosie) 0:57.72 DQ
022 The Bamboozler (the Bamboozled) DQ DQ

Final Zephyr Speed Race

MOG — Heat ONE: Won due to failure of other team to qualify

Cyclotron — Heat ONE: Did not finish, crash on the tracks

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30 Sep

Final Race Awards and Time Trial Scores

As proclaimed by Erasmus P. Kitty in Races.

Race Award Results

  • Zephyr — Unrivaled Speed:
    “Joe’s Revenge” by My Friend Joe Team
  • Isambard Kingdom Brunel — Most Grandiose Feat of Engineering:
    Lumbering Contraption by Ratchet and Rumble
  • Darling Award — Djuna’s favorite:
    “S-Car-Go” by Members of Michael McGinness’ 3-D class at Santa Rosa Junior College
  • The Krakatoa — Most Likely to Destruct Spectacularly:
    “Welded Sykkelen” by Uff-Da’s
  • Erasmus P. Kitty Honorary Award —
    “Hennepin Crawler” by Krank-Boom-Clank

Race Time Trial Scores

  • Heat ONE, 1:00 pm
    “MOG” by Children’s Museum of North Bay — 36.19
    “Lumbering Contraption” by Ratchet and Rumble — 47.10
    Rock ‘n’ Roll Sunday School — 176.65
  • Heat TWO, 2:00 pm
    Ned Kahn Studios — 32.68
    “Hennepin Crawler” by Krank Boom Clank — 52.65
    “S-Car-Go” by SRJC — 130.96
  • Heat THREE, 2:45 pm
    “Steam Pedal” by Todd Barricklow — 23.46
    “Random Tandem Pandemonium” by Whiskeydrunk Cycles — 29.06
    “Joe’s Revenge” by My Friend Joe Team — 19.68
  • Heat FOUR 3:30 pm
    “Welded Sykkelen” by Uff Da’s — 54.7
    “C-Biscuit” by SRJC — 33.9
    “Dream Team” — Did not quite finish race
  • Late Arrivals Bonus Heat FIVE, 4:15 pm
    “Funky Rail Bike” — Disqualified for having a motor but time was 24.07
    “Serpentis Family Oils and Elixers” — 117.94
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15 Sep

Neverwas Haul Goggles Awarded as Regatta Race Prize

As proclaimed by Erasmus P. Kitty in Races.

Neverwas Haul Prize Goggles

FIFTY YEARS EXPERIENCE IN MANUFACTURE!

And pronounced the best ocular protection for family use and Handcar Regatta Race Prizes, including the singularly coveted:

“Isambard Kingdom Brunel” Award in Greatest Feat of Engineering

And those who have not hitherto proved said goggles efficacy would do well to grant them a trial.

PRIZE GOGGLES by Neverwas Haul

are proven the most reliable remedy known to mankind for profuse projectiles, racking-halitosis, playa-eye, bendy-tooth, funk-sores and searing-rheumatism, including depression of style from Dandy-Tumors.

THE PROTECTIVE PANACEA

Thousands of testimonials worldwide relate extraordinary properties to result in gain of the Universal Reputation!

Sold to eyewear connoisseurs both Home and Abroad.
Advice Gratis, at the above address, daily, and by Electro-telegraphic Aetherweb-mail or by letter.

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